Do You Have Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia? Not Fatal, but No Cure

Plus a plenitude of interesting words for loquacious writers

Robert Cumming’s Bad Night for Writing, 1974, Gelatin silver (Art Institute Chicago public collection)

If you’re terrified of long words and break out in hives upon reading more than four syllables, you probably suffer from hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia,
which comes from a Latin term meaning long word. Check below to find out how to say the word.

We all grapple with unfamiliar words sometimes, but people with this disorder can be incapacitated by sesquipedalians — people who use too many long words.

I hope you get through this packet of $5 words without harm or injury, and here we go.

Pareidolia (per-ˌī-ˈdō-lē-ə) a noun

The term refers to a psychological skill that allows you to perceive a definite object, picture, or pattern where there really isn’t one. Think Rorschach-type ink spots. How about when you see an elephant within a group of clouds? That’s pareidolia.

E.g. I saw Einstein’s face on my burnt toast, but it turned out just to be pareidolia.

Verisimilitude

Now this describes a situation that has the appearance or semblance of truth or reality but isn’t exactly authentic. Writers often use this technique in world-building or character development. Using detail, metaphors, similes, and other devices adds to a story’s verisimilitude.

Harry Potter books are pretty good examples. Interestingly, to be effective, either the representation has to fall within the audience’s own experience or knowledge or it has to be convincing enough to lure the audience into suspending their disbelief.

E.g. Tolkien is a master of verisimilitude and can make readers buy into something as weird as hobbits living in a hillside.

Clinomania (cline oh mane ya) (n.)

An overwhelming, over-the-top desire to stay in bed. Admit it — you’ve been there.

E.g. Sally had a lot to do that day, but clinomania squelched her best intentions.

Potvaliant (pot-val-yuhnt) (adj.)

I love this word. Being brave and courageous simply because you are drunk.

E.g. The ranks of people willing to get a huge tattoo are bloated with potvaliant fools.

Mumpsimus (mump see mus)(n.)

This is a stubbornly incorrect use of language, pronunciation, practice, belief, and so forth, simply because you are stubbornly unwilling to correct yourself.

E.g. We’ve all known writers who perpetually commit a mumpsimus in using the word “irregardless.”

Zugzwang (tsu ktsvaŋ) (n)

A situation wherein any decision or action will be problematic even though you are compelled to take some action. It comes from German and is often applied to chess scenarios but is growing in common conversation.

E.g. Facing a real zugzwang, George knew he had to prevent his zoftig, nagging mother-in-law from plopping down in the rickety old chair.

By the way, here’s the promised pronunciation of hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia

And a bonus word, lest I fail to satisfy you:

Kakorrhaphiophobia (kak·​or·​rhaph·​io·​pho·​bia) an abnormal, abject fear of failure.

P.S. Some say the longest English word is

Methionylthreonylthreonylglutaminylarginyl…isoleucine. No, I can’t spell it. I can’t pronounce it. It’s the scientific name for the largest protein in the human body, commonly known as titin. The word contains more than 190,000 letters. If it appeared in a dictionary, it would take up more than fifty pages. Okay, that was fun. You’re welcome.

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